5th Week

Yesterday we entered our 5th week of pregnancy or about 244 days to go according to my pregnancy calculator.  During this week, our Eskimos-to-be are about the size of a sesame see and they look more like a tiny tadpole than a human.  It is made up in three layers which will later transform into vital parts and organs of a human being.

Still, everything can happen to these tiny creatures that are occupying me at the moment.  I don't want to think about it but I cannot exclude all the dangers that might happen to it.  The first trimester is said to be the most crucial phase in an embryo's life.

My fiance's mom grilled some bbq meat for dinner yesterday including salmon and she even baked fried rice for me (she called and asked me how to do it).  I really appreciate and I am very grateful for the thoughtful gestures and attentiveness.  If there is one thing I can exclude that might harm our little angels that would be toxoplamosis.

Still, last night I dreamt I miscarried the babies--horrible!  I went to the livingroom, took a HPT and tested myself.  It tested positive so I was more than relieved.  But now while I am engorged with my studying, I feel some pulsating sensation on my right lower abdomen and a cramp feeling which I had last week even when I am just passively sitting on our office chair.  I am afraid if something has happened to the uterine lining or to our little Eskimos.  I am petrified of the thought that I will miscarry them!  That and my fiance dreamt of something similar last night as well.

Seconden Beta

Our second beta was 414 at 4 weeks and 4 days.  Numbers have more than doubled.  I have a doubling time of 1.4 days which is not that bad.

I wonder if we will have twins or not. I can't wait for our first ultrasound.

Right now I'm still ubberly tired most of the time, I'm down with my asthma and I tried doing light work at home but my lower abdomen started hurting after a while... So I guess it's not worth the risk to go back to work yet. :(

But for the rest, I'm still in cloud nine! I can't believe I'm pregnant! It is a miracle!

11 Days Past Our 5 Day Eskimo Transfer

I know we tested positive already last week but still, it is reassuring to know that our (hopefully there's two of them) Eskimos are still growing in my uterus.  Now it's not just a faint second line anymore but a vivid one.

I will know my second beta result this afternoon.  I am hoping for a much higher number.

I am feeling more tired lately. The cramps have eased out so I think that's positive.  But I still avoid lifting things.  I am mostly resting at home and trying to get used to this new job description I have: Laziness.  My abdomen is still bloated but it's better as well.  I think the progesterone is causing this bloatedness but, I shouldn't complain after all a positive result is a positive result right?

Thankful for the baby dusts!  Hoping our little Eskimos are developing normally.

Beta Levels

Today is the tenth day past our first beta positive.  At three weeks our beta is 35. Now I wonder if that's a poor number or not. It first made me think that it might be possible to have a negative beta on our second blood test, which I hope it won't.

When I called my fertility clinic to inform them about the BFP they said I should have one done on the required date again. I asked what the normal HCG level at three weeks should be. And she replied the amount of HCG in my blood corresponds to what is normal.  However it is not the numbers that is important but rather the number should double itself every 2 - 3 days to see a normal development of the fetus.

If that's the case, I'm hoping that mine will be around 140 tomorrow.

Our candle from the lady of Banneux is still burning.  My future in-laws went to Scherpenheuvel yesterday to light another candle for us.  I know a lot of people are not as religious as before but I feel really glad some people are praying for us and wishing some baby dusts to come our way.

To Abstain: An IVF mythe Or Not?

 Doctors did not really mention that we should abstain however they did not mention that  going for a swim and going to the sauna is a no no either until I asked them.  So I guess googling for more information is not really that bad.

I have read that it is best to abstain until we see the first heartbeat through ultrasound.

It is has been nine days past our blastocyst transfer and I have calmed down a bit and stopped taking HPT twice a day.  Although now I keep on wondering if our two little Eskimos are still in my uterus and if they're growing beautifully together. This waiting game is a pain in the butt.

Also, I still have cramps which I spend my days lying on the couch lately. I'm really getting bored of this but I will have to endure.  At least now we have something to look forward to.

Monday is a holiday and my GP is on leave, I will have to wait until Tuesday for another blood test to see if my HCG has more than doubled since last Thursday. I can only hope so.

The Embryo After IVF Transfer

According to my findings this is what happens to the embryo in the uteeus after an IVF transfer:

3 day old embryo

Day 1:
The embryo continues to grow and develop, turning from a 6-8 cell embryo into a morula

Day 2:
The cells of the morula continue to divide, developing into a blastocyst 

Day 3:
The blastocyst begins to hatch out of its shell 

Day 4:
The blastocyst continues to hatch out of its shell and begins to attach itself to the uterus 

Day 5:
The blastocyst attaches deeper into the uterine lining, beginning implantation 

Day 6:
Implantation continues

Day 7:
Implantation is complete, cells that will eventually become the placenta and fetus have begun to develop 

Day 8:
Human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG) starts to enter the blood stream 

Day 9:
Fetal development continues and hCG continues to be secreted 

Day 10:
Fetal development continues and hCG continues to be secreted   

Day 11:
Levels of hCG are now high enough to detect a pregnancy 

5 day old blastocyst

Day 1:
The blastocyst begins to hatch out of its shell

Day 2:
The blastocyst continues to hatch out of its shell and begins to attach itself to the uterus 

Day 3:
The blastocyst attaches deeper into the uterine lining, beginning implantation 

Day 4:
Implantation continues 

Day 5:
Implantation is complete, cells that will eventually become the placenta and fetus have begun to develop 

Day 6:
Human chorionic gonadotropin (hCG) starts to enter the blood stream 

Day 7:
Fetal development continues and hCG continues to be secreted 

Day 8:
Fetal development continues and hCG continues to be secreted 

Day 9:
Levels of hCG are now high enough to detect a pregnancy

SYMPTOMS
I'm more dizzy and I drink a lot more than before. 
My stomach still looks like it's a 4 month old baby bump when in fact I am just 8 days past transfer.

EVERYONE KNOWS
Yup, I think it is better for everyone to know.  

BFP

I couldn't wait any longer. After all this time and all the cycles we underwent, I just couldn't wait any longer. So I went to my GP's practice and showed him my second HPT.

He agreed to take a blood test to make a conclusion out of it.

Just before midnight I received an email from him--yes! A BFP it was!  I can't keep it any longer so I went upstairs, asked my fiance if we can talk.

I just took out the test and he asked what it meant, I told him it's a positive.  I showed him the blood test and he was really happy taking me, "be very extra careful from now on, baby please!"

So we are having a baby! Now to let it stay in there. Up to the next three months!

Vivid at 16:22

I still can't stop thinking about the second faint pink line result from the rest I took this morning.  Does it mean it's a BFP? Or is it just my eyes and mind paying tricks on me?  Are our little Eskimos really alive and growing in me or will the pink line just disappear after a while?  Questions started flooding my mind and I started surfing and reading about other people's experiences with faint pink lines on their HPTs.  I was jumpy, I told myself to calm down.  I picked up the phone and called our GP. He said it will still be too early to rely on that.  I still want early blood test done.

I thought of waiting until tomorrow to test again. I thought... Because by the moment I came downstairs, I took another HPT and tested again.

Guys what? A more vivid second pink line!

Are we getting a BFP???

6dp5fet

Today is the sixfth day past our frozen Eskimo transfer.  I took a test again. But is that a second faint pink line I'm seeing?

I just looked at Google images and saw that there are people who lined up hpt results from as early as day 2 past transfer and ended with a positive result. I thought, "why haven't I thought of that?"

DO I BELIEVE IN MIRACLES?

Last night just before we went to sleep, my fiance asked me if I believe in miracles. "Such a difficult question", I admitted to him.

I mentioned that right after the transfer, he took me to Banneux.  It is supposed to be a holy ground since the virgin mary appeared to an ordinary girl seven times (Story here).  Although I find it even more hard to believe because everything is commercialized in there. Just outside the holy ground, bottle containers are being sold so one can collect water from the fountain and faucet. It has been said that the water can heal illnesses.  Candles are extremely expensive in my opinion but I understand that they have to be made as well.

Nevertheless, we lit a candle ourselves in the chapel and bought two 9 day novena candle at home and a bottle of water.  My fiance believes in miracles, so who am I to say miracles doesn't exist? Besides it doesn't hurt to have a little faith.

So I told my fiance, if miracles do exist, then let this be our little miracle.  I am moved by the amount of moral support that we get from our family, friends and colleagues.

I will test again tomorrow and see if the pink line is somewhat vivid than that of today.

Still wishing and praying for some baby dust in here.

4dp5dfet

Today is the fourth day past our 5 day old frozen embryo transfer.

Yesterday, although it was just our third day, I couldn't help myself but test. Although I knew that it will not show a second pink line (it's negative).

My stomach's still bloated and feels heavy. I don't have any signs as if I will get my monthly period.

I installed the app baby center to follow my "weekly pregnancy".  Honestly I am really scared of false hope again. I can only wish so much but the fear of getting that negative hptest is stronger than anything else.  Why would this time be any different than the last cycles?

The doctor sounded really positive about it though and we have been guided and treated really well by our fertility clinic than our previous.  They showed some sense of pride in their work, treating us seriously and gave answers to our unanswered questions.  Still, why should it work this time?

Perhaps because some baby dusts have been sprinkled on us by the holy Mary of Banneux where my fiance took me shortly after transfer?

I am trying hard to be hopeful.  If there is some sort of a miracle, let it be this and grant us our hearts' desires

Our 5-day Eskimo Transfer

Our doctor aspirated 10 follies of which seven were fertilized and 3 were placed in cryopreservation after day 5 and 2 others were placed on preserve the day after. Yes! We never got this far and we are so happy! So far everything has worked out well despite the OHSS and a torsi of my left ovary (that was very painful! I was rushed to the ER and we lost a lot of good developing follies). Now we have 5 mini Eskimos in the freezer waiting to be transferred when my hormones and ovaries return to normal.

WAITING FOR THE TRANSFER

It has been a struggle for me as I have been waiting for my period to come so we can start with the stimulation. I haven't slept for days thinking that this will not work again. I'm stressed and I have turned into a wacko googling and reading forums that might somehow help me or reassure me that we will have a transfer and that it will be successful.

My doctor advised me to stay home as stress has a bad influence to implantation.  Luckily the odds has turned to our side and there was no need to wait for my period to come. I was ovulating myself and we can transfer without any stimulation!

2 ESKIMOS

In Belgium you don't get to decide how many embryos you get to transfer as most of the costs are paid back by the healthcare for 6 IVF cycles. For women aging <35 transfer is limited to 1 embie during the first two cycles while women older than mentioned can have a maximum of 2 embies transferred.

It is our third cycle and honestly we thought we never got this far so better to have two than nothing right?  So we had two little Eskimos transferred last Friday!

THE AGONY OF THE 2WW

Our beta test is only on the 29th. Exactly 14 days after our 5d fet.  The waiting game again begins for me.  I have looked up online as to when I can do a HPT. So far I have read about 6dp5dfet can give a positive result, but I can't bear the stress in waiting again.

SYMPTOMS

I don't know what early symptoms to notice as it is just 2 days past transfer. Of course I have read a lot of possible symptoms already. As of the moment I feel heavy lower abdominal pressure after a few hours of standing. It can be eased by lying down and resting.  My abdomen looks like I'm 4 months pregnant already, maybe I'm just bloated.